Tag Archives: faithfulness

The Mountain of the Lord

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“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, I am weak.

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, I am a sinner.

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, I am not good enough

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, I am an addict

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, I am a failure

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, I must go to church

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, I’ve not been approved

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, my life is in shambles

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, I am not healed

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, I don’t know how to pray

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, I cannot fast

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, I am not good

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, I am busy with your work

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, my leaders do not approve

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, I am afraid

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God, I don’t know how

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

but God …

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord”

The Lord is GOOD

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May we know the REST of God within us this day. May we know the GOODNESS of God surrounding us this day. May we know the GLORY of God touching us this day. And may we ABOUND in GLAD Hearts, this day and all days. This is our heritage in the Lord.

“Then Zachariah was filled with the Holy Spirit and prophesied,Blessed be the Lord, the God of Israel; he came and set his people free.He set the power of salvation in the center of our lives, and in the very house of David his servant,Just as he promised long ago through the preaching of his holy prophets:Deliverance from our enemies and every hateful hand;Mercy to our fathers, as he remembers to do what he said he’d do,What he swore to our father Abraham— a clean rescue from the enemy camp,So we can worship him without a care in the world, made holy before him as long as we live.And you, my child, “Prophet of the Highest,” will go ahead of the Master to prepare his ways,Present the offer of salvation to his people, the forgiveness of their sins.Through the heartfelt mercies of our God, God’s Sunrise will break in upon us,Shining on those in the darkness, those sitting in the shadow of death,Then showing us the way, one foot at a time, down the path of peace.” Luke 1:70-79

Centres of Gravity

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I am reading a book about strategies of war. The chapter just read is about discerning the centre of gravity of a person or army. I would add, discerning one’s own centre of gravity.

The author gives an example of a boxer. While it may seem that the jabs of the boxers gloves may be the thing that establishes the winner, that it is actually the balance of the boxer upon which a match depends; the balance of the boxer is the centre of gravity. Upset the boxers balance and the boxer loses the fight.

It’s got me thinking. Reviewing. What is Capturing Courage’s centre of gravity?

1.Coming on the inside, as one long-term friend recently said, is a core tenant at CCIM. This is modelled after Luke 9 and 10, where Jesus first sends out the twelve disciples, and then sends out the seventy-two. Paraphrased:

  • Go
  • Take nothing with you (be vulnerable, without financial clout or possessions, but within relationships to come)
  • Enter the town (as led by the Spirit)
  • Look neither to the right or the left (face like flint, focussed, no distractions)
  • Find the house of peace. (as discerned by the Spirit)
  • Enter in. Settle. Eat what is fed you. Sleep as prepared for you. (honour those keeping you, receive well)
  • Then, after all this Jesus tells them that NOW you can pray and heal and declare the Kingdom of God at hand.

The power of relationships, of rapport and trust, of mutual submission and honour, is the primary mechanism (we may call it) upon which all of Capturing Courage ministry rests. Without this there would be no CCIM ministry. Vulnerable, mutual, honourable, relationships is a centre of gravity at Capturing Courage.

2. Living in the manna. People often think that we are a wealthy organization, that there must be a lot of money in order to have been advanced in the way that is evident over the years. But this is not the case at all. Money is not one of our centres of gravity, rather relying on the Lord for all financial provision, is.

In the understanding of a centre of gravity, this means that we cannot be undone by little to no finances. We have found our heart and soul apart from money. We have found the Lord moves us forward regardless of the funds we think we might need.

To be sure we are well-blessed by a number of generous financial partners. But we do not have a lot of these. We literally have nine monthly financial donors. And then a small handful of others that give throughout the year as they are able or as the Holy Spirit alerts them.

Contrary to most organizations, money is not a centre of gravity at Capturing Courage. This makes us exceptionally strong as we are long on faith and deep in trust, nimble and strong in stewardship of what we do have at any given time. Trust in the Lord for all our needs, living in the manna as we call it, is our centre of gravity. This comes of relationship with God, from deep inside of us, and cannot be touched by outward circumstance.

3. Love. Whenever we have been overwhelmed by the work, put upon by the great needs of so many people, so low on my own capacity, we ask God for more love. The love of God, becoming our own love, is a centre of gravity at Capturing Courage.

Out of the love of God we are glad to be with people. Because God LOVES people. Out of this we are strengthened to carry on with the work apportioned to us. Because God LOVES people. We find our purpose and are reminded of what God wants to do with us, as we settle into his love. Because God LOVES us.

And then too, within the great love of others unto us, we enter in, gladly settle into favour, honour all that folks offer to us, are deep in gratitude, and eager to serve and to do all we might do to encourage and build up the body of Christ around the world.

Love is the centre of gravity that holds all of what we do, together.

4. Holy Spirit. Last but not least we walk according to the Holy Spirit. This means that we refuse to make our own way. We never make plans and then ask God to bless them. We avoid excess focus or energy that would remove from us our nimbleness of obedience, of hearing the Lord, and of moving forward in perfect sync with God.

Our blessed Holy Spirit is our centre of gravity. She is the light of our lives and the one who shines through us. It is her light that directs us, quietly leads us, strengthens us, and by her kiss we are gladdened and in joy.

We listen long. We use strategy of slow, slow, quick, quick. Relationship, faces turned to God, ears held to the ground, God’s purposes over our own, are possible because of Holy Spirit our helper. Thank You Holy Spirit.

These are the primary centres of gravity at Capturing Courage. These are the strategies of God for us and through us. It appears that very little can touch these. For they are first and foremost, manners of heart that flow from the Lord himself.

The Kingdom of God has different centres of gravity than what we would envision or expect or want even, from a people or god purposed to win over the whole world. It is why the Kingdom of God, the manner of our Lord, cannot be discerned by worldly eyes, only by spiritual hearts. We are surprised and dismissive of things like, love, vulnerability, honour. We wonder, ‘How do these things win a war?’

But they do. And they will. And they are.

Love disarms evil. Peace is powerful and active. Honour makes for soft hearts.

Vulnerability is the strongest kind of strength.

Like water under a rug, is God with us and through us.

Let us rest ourselves on the strategies of God.

We are revisiting all this as we look ahead to a House of Prayer. What are our centres of gravity?

Do we lead with these the same way with a specific house within a specific community?

How might these past leadings, manner, and way of God apply as we come to a ministry settled into time and space?

As for me, I am super excited to find out.

Yes Lord. Yes.

Poverty Strongholds #10 – The Demonic Factor

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Poverty Strongholds – Post Ten – The Demonic Factor

  1. Demons
  2. Poor Stewardship – link to past article
  3. Lack of Knowledge (common sense)
  4. Mind Sets (faulty thinking)
  5. Lack of Holiness
  6. Agreements with the Enemy
  7. Bad Theology
  8. Blaming & Excuses
  9. Refusing to be a Blessing
  10. Pain Upon Pain

I’ve introduced all the other strongholds, so today, let’s take a look at the 1st Poverty Stronghold – Demons

On our original pie chart and in our list of poverty strongholds we had demons as first on the list. This was because the thinking that led to this entire series began with a theology relayed to us of how demons were the entire problem for all poverty and for everything that goes wrong.

In a certain area in Uganda we were told that all of the pervasive problems of that region were due to this very large tree that had had a demon in it, and that when the tree was cut down and distributed throughout the entire area the demonic stronghold became established in the entire area. This was the understanding, the belief, the theology. This is what we were told was the entire problem.


demonic conversation extension 2

But of course, as a professional people developer and as a prayer minister, I know that if we give all blame (ie:credit) to the demonic we have just given fully 100% of our power away, we’ve become victims and have entered ourselves into apathy and despair. So I roughly jotted out my thinking about this issue with the result being this series of posts. Today, in this series, I finally come to address the demonic factor. Let’s talk about that.

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Poverty Strongholds Post #3 – Poor Stewardship

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Poverty Strongholds – Post #3 – Poor Stewardship

  1. Demons
  2. Poor Stewardship
  3. Lack of Knowledge (common sense)
  4. Mind Sets (faulty thinking)
  5. Lack of Holiness
  6. Agreements with the Enemy
  7. Bad Theology
  8. Blaming & Excuses
  9. Refusing to be a Blessing
  10. Pain Upon Pain

Walking through these poverty strongholds we will begin with our second stronghold, Poor Stewardship. I’ll write a post on each of these separately, for I am realizing the depth of the material to explore.

Let’s Begin: Poor Stewardship 

Poor Stewardship refers to the basic principle of being faithful with a little. From my own experience and observations this ‘faithful with a little’ is either a character strength or a character flaw. We either take care of the things entrusted to us or we do not.

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Hands Off!

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Every once in awhile I come across an indiscretion within the body of Christ. It is something that in some circles is considered normal but ultimately reveals itself to be the precursor to much bad fruit. It is this thing about permission and an assumed ownership of each other’s gifting and callings.

I remember many years ago sitting in a church service listening to a message regarding the verse, “To him who has been given much, much is required” and immediately through my mind ran a litany of all the things I had been given.

Now, the Lord had already been telling me for some years that one day I would be impacting many, many people around the world. I was slowly adjusting to this thought and preparing myself for this work of the Lord that was still off in some distant future.

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Walking in The Way

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I recently created a diagram to illustrate the work that CCIM does compared to the more traditional and humanitarian aid work that many organizations are involved towards. First off I want to make it plain and clear that there is nothing wrong with humanitarian aid work. For many around the world it is a lifeline that speaks to the reality of God in our midst through the practical help of others. I myself have benefited from practical help through the years.

What I learned though, through my own years, is the understanding that for every bad fruit in our lives there is a bad root. Bad fruit does not just come from nowhere, there is always a legal right for that bad fruit to be there. CCIM at the roots - Version 2

What I mean is this: authority in the spirit realm works by very clear rules and principles with each one of us giving either Satan or God authority in our lives.

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Capturing God’s Heart – Money – Volume 34

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There is nothing quite like money to test our integrity and our priorities. Through money we can easily see the character of a person, the quality of an organization, and the honesty of a church.

As humans we are quite naturally concerned with our everyday needs. We are concerned with where we live, the food we are eating, the things we must pay for and provide for ourselves and those we are caring for.

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Bearing God

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I learned the power of fasting years ago. It was during the start of my own inner healing journey. I was scheduled for prayer ministry every second week and I made a commitment to myself to fast for the twenty-four hours leading up to and through my appointments.

I never really could pinpoint the power of that fasting at the time but I did know the power of those prayer sessions, they changed my life. A few years later a friend was experiencing her own set of prayer ministry yet she confided to me that she wasn’t getting much out of them, that God still seemed distant and her heart was not touched.

I suggested that she fast the twenty-four hours leading up to and through her sessions and the next week she reported a profound new depth in her experience of prayer and of healing before the Lord; it was a night and day difference to what had been before.

There is something about fasting that removes our coping mechanisms, our veneers, our defences. When we give up food for a time we are brought low in need and the ultimate sort of preoccupation with self. And in that reminder of our hunger we turn to God with a heart serious on receiving His help; we can’t do this on our own.

As the years progressed and I began ministering in prayer myself there were many a time when I would awake in a morning and was not really hungry and so I would eat very little. Later in the day I would come to find that so-and-so needs an emergency prayer session and then I would know, “Oh that is why I ate so little today.” Many times the Lord orchestrated my fasting without my prior knowledge.

Not only is fasting for ourselves but fasting enters us into spiritual work alongside the Lord Jesus Christ; our understanding is heightened and our perceptions are clearer.

In more recent years my fasting has taken on various modes. I rarely fast food any more and I’ve learned not to fast unless the Holy Spirit explicitly directs me. For fasting must never be used as a manipulative tool to get what we want. It is never a good idea to take what worked here and try to make it work there.

Our walks with the Lord must never become business, never a product that we transfer from here to there thinking that it worked so well there, why not here? Relationship with God is not something to be taken lightly and so we do not move according to our own best wisdom or ideas and this includes fasting.

In recent years as I’ve travelled and ministered overseas each trip is preceded by some sort of fasting. God woos me and invites me to join him and his work, entering into the holy of holies. My first trip was preceded by six weeks of no makeup; no easy feat at the time. Since then I’ve fasted jewelry and tea amongst other things; not easy either if you know me.

I find fasting closely linked to a nesting type experience where all of who I am is entered into silence and heart preparation for a spiritual work to come. Because we at CCI move at the explicit direction of the Holy Spirit and not before, this fasting and nesting is in fact one of the first things to alert me to a trip and to ministry to come. I’ve learned to watch for it and pay attention to it; when my spirit hunkers down there is the Lord’s work for me around the corner.

Fasting is no longer for myself per se, it’s not by my volition but rather it’s an act of preparation and coming alongside the Lord with a tangible and physical sign and commitment that I agree with what is to come and his use of me; I am glad to be alongside God in this way. He directs it and enables it, enables me.

My first trip in 2014 is back to Uganda. We’ve not yet settled on the exact month but I can feel it coming. Thoughts have moved from my mind to my heart and are now settling in my spirit and I’m entering into the nesting and the birthing that precedes a work of the Lord.

This bearing of a work is hard work. The heart of God presses down on me and I become his bearer in a way, birthing him.

Who’s the Boss?

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As with any para-church organization, as with any start-up of any sort, as with any new church plant, we at Capturing Courage have been walking through financial challenges and lessons for awhile now. And we have learned a lot of things.

I used to shy away from money matters. Money used to frighten me and there was always a sense of confusion about how to navigate choices and decisions regarding money. But of course this didn’t do me any good whatsoever. I used to think that the answer to this confusion would be to have more money. After all, if I wasn’t hindered in my choices perhaps I wouldn’t be so confused.

But large infusions of money are never the answer. I know this now. For if we are not competent in the little we won’t be competent in the much. These last few years have seen us becoming competent in the little. And it’s been a really good thing.

In the midst of the last couple of years a few definitive things have been sorted out within my own being that are now impacting the character and nature of us at CCI (as in any organization the leader sets the tone and standard and growth – the organization won’t grow beyond the leaders growth).

The first thing the Lord did was to separate my sense of self from money. In other words, who I am has nothing to do with, takes no bearing from, where our money is at at any given time. Meaning, if I had debt (I learned this in the midst of debt) I was not a less-than person. God poured into me his love and grace and comfort and leading just the same in debt as in much.

This was the work of many painful months (as the Lord dismembered my unholy soul ties with money – I was way too associated with money), looking back I wouldn’t undo this. For this separation then set into place the ability to have much without it making any statement about myself as well. And as we go forward within the many promises and assurances from the Lord that there is plenty of money for the work called of us it is imperative that much does not speak of us but speaks of our Lord.

In other words, I am the same person whether in want or in wealth. This was a critical first thing to learn and something I learned down to the marrow of my bones. As Paul wrote in Philippians, ” for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need.” 4:11-12

This journey with money has simply been a process of removing ego from the mix. In any of the things we are called to, but particularly within the spirit realm, there must not be anything of us in the mix. Meaning, where we are in the flesh we are weak and prone to compromise and confusion (and outright attack). Where we are in the spirit things are clear and systematic, genuine and true investments in the kingdom of God.

Ego particularly shows up in money decisions. I recently received a text from one of our Ugandan pastors who was expecting me in January. I had let him know that we had made the decision that I would not travel there in January for a number of reasons. His reply was laden thick with disappointment and it caught at my heart.

All of a sudden, where one day before I was so sure that I wasn’t to travel, I now desperately wanted to head there in January. But upon further study of my heart I realized that there was still woven through me this lie and feeling of being a disappointment. I went before the Lord with it, did some business alongside the spirit, wept and prayed it through, and have come out the other side freer than before.

You see, if our decisions are laden with our own ego and the lies and such woven there, our decisions will be bad ones. And we will end up ineffective and unproductive in the work at hand.

We have made it very clear in our statements about how we decide when and where to travel and that we move according to the Holy Spirit only. We don’t go with our best ideas or anyone else’s for that matter. Yet right there in the midst of feeling a disappointment all of the careful movement with the spirit was almost thrown out the window.

For, with the spirit + not disappointing = really bad decision making.

Ego had to be removed once more from the equation. Money matters and the decisions around them highlight where our ego’s remain in the mix. For in my need (notice, my need, not the Lords) to not disappoint I was ready to bombard our donors for more money and to ‘make it happen’ for January in Uganda.

But in this I would have violated so many of the things we have learned. For instance:

1. Do with what we have.

2. God is not in a rush.

3. Faithful with a little.

4. Trust the timing of each trip.

5. Slow steady growth is best.

6. Do not move with the programs of men.

7. Rest in the Lord and he will provide.

And quite frankly, if the only way we can follow the leading of the Lord and understand his timing is by the money at hand or not at hand, we are still crippled as leaders. If the only thing that tells us that ‘yes now it is time to go to such and such a place’ is the money available we are sunk.

It’s one of the other things I’ve been learning and that must still be fully realized in my being, that money is a non-entity. That in the kingdom of God money holds no more power than a flea on the ground. It is us who give way too much power to money. It is us who exaggerate its voice.

To truly move by the Spirit would be the ability (for us at CCI) to hold back even with much money in the bank. For are we making rational decisions alongside the spirit or emotional decisions alongside money?

Our hearts want to go everywhere today. As we continue building and investing and showing up in relationship after relationship my own heart is torn and tested time and again. We cannot go everywhere at once. I’m not even so sure we can go everywhere in this coming year. So how do we decide?

What I do know, is that we wait on the leading and the guiding of the Holy Spirit. We put aside our own best thoughts and wisdoms and we truly wait. Then, when the Lord says, ‘Go’, then we go, and not before. At the same time when the Lord says, ‘Go’ we make our plans in the provision of the Lord even if we cannot see it all at the front end.

Money is simply passion and energy and vision and we call it forth in surrender and service to the leading of our Lord. The lack of it will not lead us, the much of it will not lead us. Rather, we are led by the Spirit of our Living God.

As we surrender again and again to this way of being alongside our Lord we create a space, we lead the way, we set the stage, we model to money that it too must surrender to this way. Money must also bow itself to the timing and direction of our Lord here at CCI.

Amen and amen in the name and the blood of our Living Lord Jesus Christ.

With all glory to you Father.

Capturing God’s Heart – Rules for Living – Volume 31

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It is easy to want rules for living. Something that tells us “do this” and “don’t do that” removes us from the need to walk in true relationship with God. If we can just figure out what he wants then we simply have to follow a to-do list.

But the Gospel of Jesus Christ and the work of The Kingdom is much more than what we are doing or not doing. The Gospel of Jesus Christ is about relationship, about nuance, about principles for living (not rules), and about our manner of being woven throughout everything.

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