Tag Archives: Jesus Christ

A Gift of Contrition

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P1340113 compressedGood Friday. A day of juxtapositions. A day of death and a day of hope. A day of torture and a day that frees our souls. A day of everything gone wrong and everything set right.

The gift of Good Friday is the gift of repentance.

A day that forever more opens up opportunity to put our lives out on the table, say it like it is, all the good the bad and the ugly, and find sweet relief.

It is a day that marks a new freedom to confess, to say ‘I did that’ and to be released.

Released from the guilt and the shame and regret. A day for new beginnings. Fresh starts.

We cannot talk about freedom until we have talked about repentance. For freedom only comes on the back-side of our admitting what has not gone so well; the back-side of our acknowledging where in fact it has gone very badly.

It is a crises of our psych’s to admit wrong-doing and less-than living. An incredibly vulnerable moment when we do not know if a sword will fall or a hand will be extended.

Before the cross, before the King of Kings, what is the verdict? In the deepest parts of our being our hearts are unsure.

It is only as we come with nothing left to lose that we find grace and mercy and freedom.

The blood of Jesus shed on Calvary truly washes away our sin.

We are new creatures. Fresh. Alive. Free.

We find upon repentance that Jesus has in fact already claimed 100% responsibility for your and my sin and all the resulting ramifications.

“You didn’t do that, I did” Jesus declares.

Bring to mind the worst thing you’ve ever done. It doesn’t have to be big, it may be very small, but it is that thing that won’t leave you. That act or word or decision that never leaves you. That haunts you day and night. That though you move forward in all of life that one thing feels like a mill-stone about your neck.

About that thing, Jesus declares, “You didn’t do that, I did. I’ve taken responsibility and though you cannot see it I am working behind the scenes of your life that all the ugly and the nasty might be leveled off and made smooth. Made right. You didn’t do that thing, I did.”

But of course, those denying and refusing to acknowledge whats gone wrong through them, will never receive this gift.

Life is for those who admit they are dying.

Denials of heart and mind are found in all walks and stations around the world. Some of the deepest denials are those of believers, those of Christians who’ve managed to live lives of restraint and caution and prudence, but cannot see their own hearts judgments and condemnations.

These are the worst sins of all. Believers impervious to saving grace.

Believers still counting on their good works and their prudent lives to save them. It doesn’t work this way.

At the cross we are all on level ground. Every single one of us. And where we are angry for the grace and mercy shown another, we will not receive it ourselves.

Think of the kind of person that offends you to your very core. Bring to mind the kinds of acts that disgust you. Imagine the depths of horrors perpetrated on innocents around the world.

And get it, that that one stands beside you at the cross. That one is right there, elbow to elbow with you. That one has access to the same grace that you have.

Two very different lives standing before the cross. One clean and unsmeared. The other filthy and degrading. Stand equal at the cross.

For those who’ve lived ‘good’ lives this should break us. We are no better. In fact, unless we can find the core of our sin we will be worse off.

For the cross is for those who repent. The gift is given only to the contrite.

“Jesus I come to you today with parts of my life deeply offensive to you. I am sorry. Today I give over my life and take on your life. You have shown us the way to God and I say thank-you. Please teach me how to live and in fact, I now depend on you to transform me from the inside out, something I’ve never been able to do myself. I welcome you Jesus into my life. Thank-you for loving me. Amen” 

Bucket List

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Cyndy LavoieI’ve never been ambitious in the traditional sense of the word. Never really had any burning desire to travel, had little inclination to jump out of planes (okay, no inclination), and haven’t ever been very daring when it comes to my personal physical being (ladders too high scare me).

I don’t ski, I don’t windsurf, I don’t even jog. Until I went to Uganda I would have chosen to stay off of a motorcycle thank-you-very-much. Mountains are pretty to look at but I don’t need to climb them.

Long story short I’ve struggled making a bucket list. You know, that list of things we would love to do before we die, before we kick the bucket?

Well I’ve not really had one. Until I realized that of course I do – it just looks very different than what I was expecting. So different in fact that I almost missed it.

Yet stirring deep in my being, for some time now, have been the following desires, and it has occurred to me that this is my bucket list.

1. I want to be transported in the Spirit to a gathering of believers across the seas.

2.  I want to board a plane without having bought a ticket, my ticket just being there by the Lord.

3. I want to raise the dead to life.

4. I want to heal bodies.

5. I want to meet and minister to Moses and Elijah when they sit in sackcloth on the streets of Jerusalem, maybe give them a bottle of water each.

6. I want to be a New York Times bestselling author.

7. I want someone to recognize the language I am speaking when I speak in tongues.

8. I want to pray and declare emotional and spiritual freedom over multitudes.

9. I want to have my children alongside me in ministry.

10. I want to receive a gem-stone supernaturally from the Lord.

11. I want to walk under an open heaven.

12. I want to see nations transformed by the power of God’s immense love and grace.

And that’s it. Twelve relatively simple things. This list feels quite doable but only because of who my God is. Not one of these can I make happen on my own. They all require collaboration of the highest order.

And something about that tickles me pink, and leaves me very excited.

Mona Lisa

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P1200321 compressedLike any great artist God has created the world we live in, all of nature and animals, the wonders of the deep, the beauty of the galaxies, and you and I.

All of it is magnificent. (and that is an understatement)

In the process of this artistry God poured all of his/her (God is both male and female, many languages have no personal pronouns designating gender, the English language is sadly constrained in this) into the masterpiece.

All of God’s goodness, all of his hopes and dreams, all of passion and ecstasy, all of dance and worship, all of grace and sufficiency, of wealth of soul and spirit, of rich relationships, community and communion has been poured into this Masterpiece.

The principles and the spiritual laws and the ways the universe works and holds together is based on who God is. Every single thing we can observe about nature and science reflects God.

Like any great art piece, if we look long enough and observed deep enough we would see the handiwork of the master. We would come to recognize the heart of the one who painted and sculpted and composed.

We spot a Monet and we know it is a Monet. We take in a Rembrandt and we know that it is a Rembrandt. Mozart is Mozart and Vivaldi is Vivaldi. Each artist has a unique style and heart and feel to their work.

So it is with God. We and this world are his living masterpiece. Invited to live out the masters heart in full color and joy and dance and satisfaction we are fashioned to give evidence of God.

But we have mucked with the masterpiece. We’ve not been respectful of the artist. Missing the heart of the artist, even in this world, can be easy to do. Many of the ‘great’ artists were not so great in their day. Only with time did the genius with which they create come to be truly appreciated.

The numerous and untold ways that we have mucked with God’s masterpiece range from violent acts against humanity all the way to the violent thoughts of our hearts. From overt acts to covert acts and to intentions of the heart we have been disrespectful of the Master Artist and his creation. From sins of commission to sins of omission to sins of the heart we have been exceptionally disrespectful.

Imagine if you will, that you are setting out a family dinner. It is summer, you are gathered outside. The sun is shining, the burgers are on the grill, the salads are plentiful, the sauces and chili and mustard and relish and ketchup are all at hand.

There are beverages, soda pop, beer, kool-aid, coffee, tea, wine, maybe even some homemade slushies.

It is going to be a great feast.

But before we all set down to eat, one of us pulls out a tablecloth (picnic tables need tablecloths after all). It is something that Uncle Ben* (not his real name) found.

It is the Mona Lisa. Imagine, if you will (and if it were really big enough for this) that we are using the Mona Lisa as our tablecloth.  Not knowing its value, not knowing its worth, ignorant of its beauty and importance we set our cups and plates and stemware and silverware on her.

We gather around. Henry is seated at her one shoulder, Joey is round the other side flanked by the toddlers. Grandpa Joe who likes to take his teeth out during dinner is at the head of the table. The baby in her highchair even has a place. With Martha on the corner, getting up and down to serve the food, that spot becomes the most frayed.

And every meal we gather and eat and laugh and make merry, and in it all, though we do not know it, we are profoundly and deeply offensive. Not because making merry is bad, but because we are making common what is in fact a masterpiece.

Picnics are fun, they are also messy. With glasses spilled, ketchup dropping, mustard staining, baby’s throwing up, with the sun beating down, with sudden windstorms and maybe even rain, with forks jammed through the cloth by bored teens and initials scratched in the surface by a love struck ones… with hot pots set on its surface, candle wax dropping, cream and sugar spilled, pepper smearing… there is profound disrespect for the artwork and for the artist.

We don’t even know what we are doing.

And this is exactly what we have done with God’s art work. We kill, we lie, we lust, we covet, we hate, we despise, we gossip, we destroy, our hearts become toxic, we come with hidden agenda’s, we reach across the table to fix another’s table manners only to spill our own drink … And we don’t really get what we are doing.

Like those picnicking on the Mona Lisa we have no clue. It is only by the grace of God that we come to any understanding at all. Our hearts cannot perceive it. We have sat at our Mona Lisa tablecloth for too long. The picnic has been had.

It is the gospel story what comes next. God in his heartbroken and battered state, with disillusionment and grief, with full knowledge of the loss rises up to fight for us and for creation, for beauty and restoration. God sends a part of himself to cover the damage.

Jesus spreads himself out as our tablecloth over that table. The Mona Lisa is still there, the damage has been done, but God rises above the hurt to say, “Never mind, I will take care of it.”

We must eat, we must gather as before, but this time, for those who are aware of the deep insult to the heart of God, we accept and receive Jesus as the covering. It is in him we eat.

Jesus spreads himself out, covering over the offense done, making a new way, carrying the stains and the smears and the messes of our ketchup and relish and mustard. He says, “I’ll be the tablecloth, I’ll cover over your offense, come, sit and eat.”

And in this grace, as we accept deep contrition into our beings, we find companionship and community around the table as before yet even better. For this time it is in respect and honor of our creator, of the Master Artist and of the masterpiece sitting next to us. We recognize that we’ve been spoiling a great work of art and we are sorry.

And God replies, “I know, I’ve got it covered.”

Walking In Spiritual Authority – Part Three – Spiritual Authority

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Spiritual Authority ultimately plays out as a function of who we are. We move from doing to being.

While it is straightforward to take orders the Lord calls us into a deeper kind of walk and work of the Spirit. The power of who you are, your passions, your dreams and goals and the visions given you by the Lord are welcomed in the King’s Kingdom.

For more than anyone else he gets you, sees the real you, and expects you to join him.

Taking back this world for God requires full participation of all of us.

Part Three: Spiritual Authority & Moving Forward

It is in losing our life that we find it. And here in Spiritual Authority we begin to bring all of the prior lessons into a practical grid by which we do life. Under the radar and hidden in the light of Christ has us experiencing and making a difference in our own lives and in this world.

  • war | taking the land | our Lord Jesus Christ | respect for the enemy | birthing authority | expressions | thresholds | heart | will | risk | human | discernment | wisdom | language | cleansing | holiness | presence | markers | no renegades allowed | freedom

We are better together. Moving forward has us settling into the best of each other. In the community of the body of Christ we find a culture of strength and empowerment. We find our impact here and now stretches forward beyond time.

  • answerable to God | who’s on the bus | ministry | how big is your God | fear | support system | persecution | strength needs support | in the game | your team | four pillars | falling | open lives | for the church | transitions | spiritual freedoms | binding | claiming | sealing | eternity
 

Pushing through and into ministry that carries on after us requires certain things. After the initial investment and excitement comes time for staying power. For yet more faithfulness, more transparency, more authenticity.

For more love, more wisdom, more courage and more strength. These we find in the body of Christ. The work is bigger than us, and while we may find courage as one, we find strength as many.

Any Questions? Contact Us

 
The Kingdom of God does not consist in talk but in power. 1 Corinthians 4:20 ESV.
 
 

Walking in Spiritual Authority – Part Two – At the Cross

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The human construct of our hearts, minds and psyches are equipped for the work of the lord by a systematic and deliberate process of breaking down and rebuilding.

Much like a process of increasing physical strength through weight-lifting, we too must be poured through a rigorous regimen to break down our protective barriers, our fear based reactions and the default buttons by which we do life.

There is a meeting of hearts in this experience that will never be found in a simple meeting of the minds. We engage both heart and mind and find in that intersection a full vision and experience of God.

Part Two: At the Cross & Leadership

The chaff of our lives must be brought to the cross. Anything that leaves us compromised or weak must have the breath of the Spirit breathed through. The concern with self must be surrendered, with spiritual disciplines taking its place. We steep ourselves in love, holiness, and the covering of Christ.

  • ego | humility | compassion | empathy | emotional health | heart | spirit | discipline | mastery | all about God | spiritual authority resume | prayer | faithfulness | obedience | holiness | permission | cooperation | vision | calling | character development

We will be surprised to find that the Biblical perspective of leadership is far different than we suppose. Not only is it more powerful than we ever imagined it actually will require of us more than anything we ever thought. Stepping up to the plate is the opportunity of our lifetime and a gift to our age.

  • leadership and healing | people | spiritual arrogance | timing | advanced in the kingdom | the second witness | declaration | spaces | spiritual assignment | staying true | brokenness | levels of authority | how big is your sword | bearing witness | words | action | body of Christ

The years of preparation are never a waste. While there are seemingly random events and circumstances to our lives we realize that God has indeed had every single detail worked out in its minutest form.

We are stretched to trust him with our very lives, and once the King knows he can trust us we move in him and have our being through him in ways we never imagined.

And because he knows we follow well he says, “Lead on, we are backing you.”

Any Questions? Contact Us

 
Speak and act as those who are going to be judged by the law that gives freedom, because judgment without mercy will be shown to anyone who has not been merciful. Mercy triumphs judgment. James 2:12 ESV.

Maturity – Part Two

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210 compressedIt is the season for celebrating Christ. It’s a time for coming together to honor and worship our Lord of Lord and King of Kings.

And I’m thinking there is no better time to highlight the true saving grace of Jesus. He came, after all, to make everything different. He came to heal and to make whole. He came to save us in the deepest places of our hearts and minds.

My last post was about the stuck places of our lives. Of emotions frozen in time, of maturity stalled in place, and of perspectives chronically that of a child’s way of thinking.

I’ve witnessed and experienced time and again the healing of Jesus in the very deepest parts of our beings. But while I’ve witnessed many miracles I’ve also witnessed many tragedies.

There are not many things as tragic as individuals aging with frozen thoughts, hardened emotions, little empathy and certainly no grace. Entire lifetimes, decade upon decade, given over to lies and bitterness’ multiplied over and over.

The most horrible thing with the stuck places (you know how we used to call a record that would skip and skip on the same spot a broken record), when they are not healed there are grooves of negative and damaging thought trenched into our minds and hearts.

Like giant ruts in an exceptionally muddy road that dries and hardens, we cannot leave the ruts if we tried.

We simply continue in well-worn habits of thoughts and judgments and condemnations.

While all of it can be healed and we can be freed to mature and find great satisfactions in life many don’t seek healing. Perhaps they don’t know it exists.

I’ve been prayer ministering for some twelve years and in that time I have come to be convinced that prayer actually heals our brains.

That neurological set-points are freed from those trenches. That emotional default settings are transformed. That an individual’s brain is literally rewired into the beautiful and complete original image as created by God.

No longer do we react the same ways. Those buttons that used to send us into emotional high-jackings are simply not there any longer.

The expectations and lenses by which we expected the worst from life are removed and replaced with expectations that lead to life and miracle of all miracles we receive lenses that see the good and gracious of this world.

We are no longer victims to negative emotions but we are rather celebrants able to fully experience and romp in the beauty of every range of emotion. We are free.

Without maturity freed up to continue on its natural course we simply become rigid in our thinking. Our minds literally freeze into place, repeating like broken records the disappointments and the regrets, the losses and the injustices, as though talking about them non-stop will bring restitution. It never does.

The minds that I have personally witnessed that run on old hardened pathways end up in dementia and Alzheimers. Rigidity of thinking, like a record skipping but never rescued, goes on into eternity stuck in one place.

It is one of the saddest things to behold.

Thank-you Jesus that you came to save us from this place. Thank-You that you made a way, thank-you that you are The Way. Only in you are our minds covered in the oil of the lamb that keeps our thinking supple and flexible. Only in you are our hearts justified in our experience of emotions. And only in you are our negative and deadly experiences laid to rest at the cross, that we might get on with life.

Thank-you. We celebrate You this season.

…………………………………………………………

Back HOME

Prayer Ministry

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renewal pic tovel!Over a dozen years ago I began my own deliberate journey of inner healing. At the time I wouldn’t have named it this, as I really could not foresee what or who I might be going forward. I didn’t know what I didn’t know.

But life at the time was falling apart around me. I was stuck and needed help, and so began a six-month commitment of prayer ministry. That six months turned into about six years of deliberate healing – a journey I would forever more be grateful.

What I didn’t know at the time was that I would one day be blessed to stand alongside others in specific inner journey’s. That’s where I am today and have been for some years now.

Trained in a number of methodologies the basic premise and work is simply coming alongside another as we together seek the Lord’s wisdom and clarity and healing.

Where there have been lies we break them. Where there are strongholds from years gone by we say ‘No More!’ And where chains of compromise have become thick and heavy we simply declare them smashed.

All of this is done in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, for after all it is only because of his work on the cross by which we claim any freedom whatsoever. In and of ourselves we are stuck. But in God, everything opens up. Everything becomes fresh and new.

We simply are new creatures in Christ. Free to shine. Equipped unto strengths. Friends of God.

Today we do this work one-on-one in the Vancouver area in addition to this being the foundation of inner healing and deliverance that we take to the nations.

In agreement and in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ we are breaking strongholds, restoring emotional strengths, and bringing deep spiritual refreshment everywhere we go.

“And your ancient ruins shall be rebuilt;
    you shall raise up the foundations of many generations;
you shall be called the repairer of the breach,
    the restorer of streets to dwell in.” Isaiah 58:12

Capturing God’s Heart – The Great Expectation – Volume 19

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It’s that time of year when we celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ.

“For a child is born to us, a son is given to us. The government will rest on his shoulders. And he will be called: Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” Isaiah 9:6

It is soon Christmas. We’ve all been getting ready. Shopping. Decorating. Meals with Friends and Families. Expecting.

And what is all this expecting about? Why do we expect at Christmas?

Continue reading →

Understanding

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P1240873 compressedNot the heart. “Not the Heart!”

There is an interesting sentence in The Message’ book of Mark 6. It had been a day of miracles. Jesus had turned five loaves and two fish into enough food that fed five-thousand people, and with leftovers.

The disciples were sent across the lake on a boat, the people were sent home, Jesus took some time to pray. Up on the lake came a storm. And there came Jesus, walking toward them on the water.

Obviously the disciples were terrified as Jesus came closer to them, and yet once close enough he assured them of who he was and not to be afraid. And then he climbed into the boat, which immediately brought the storm to an end.

And here is where we read, ‘They were stunned, shaking their heads wondering what was going on. They didn’t understand what he had done at supper. None of this had yet penetrated their hearts.”

Did you read that? ‘None of this had yet penetrated their hearts.”

Isn’t that the way.

We can have miracles all around us. There can be God in our midst. The uncountable come to stay, and yet we don’t let it penetrate. We don’t get it.

When I think back over my years, that stone wall of my heart, that was bondage for me.

It was a wall thick with judgments about the way life is to go. Laden through with self-righteousness, it was like a mesh of re-bar and concrete. And into that mix, was a stance of defensiveness against vulnerability; an inability to have anything ‘touch’ me.

Thing is, we can either spend our energies opposing God, opposing miracles, opposing health and healing, or we can use our energies to allow vulnerability; to drop our guard and to stop managing by ourselves.

But of course, this is a huge risk. For starters, we will never be the same. For miracles of heart and soul, life and limb, have nothing of control in them whatsoever.

So if we want control, I guess we do without the miraculous.

Surrender is key.

We might rather have our hunger. We enjoy rather, our drama and illness and disease. We like our self-righteous stances of less-than and poor-me. After all, what would we talk about, if not for our troubles?

We say we want the fixes, we say we want things to go better, we say we want health and healing, but our hearts are stoney, cold and indifferent.

We refuse to be comforted, we hold tight our paradigms of ‘this is a bad cold world’, and… we get what we expect.

It’s as though we want the miracles, but we don’t want to be changed. Just like the disciples amazing things can be happening all around us, but we’ve hearts and eyes that cannot comprehend.

Let it go. Allow the living God to penetrate. We must put down our best thoughts and our own understandings, put down our drama and our self-pity, put down, on the table, our stony hearts.

Where we demand justice, to allow grace.

Where we hold tight to death, to allow life.

Where we must be right, to allow uncertainty.

Where we condemn, to allow new paradigms.

Our hearts will be changed. The things we once held to so tightly will fade away. We won’t understand much, but we will be free, healthy, and whole.

How might we allow the Spirit to touch our hearts today?

A Revolution

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faithfulness to GodWoven through many of the messages that I heard in Uganda, is an undertone, and often an explicit statement that says, “Come to God and He will make you Great”

or, “Come to Jesus and you will be Big”

Or the most blasphemous statement heard via the television on my last trip, “The wealthier you are the holier you are”

Wow, eh…

So much wrong with that one. But even the other ones, ‘come to God so as to be great’, are gross misrepresentations of the scriptures.

Nowhere have I ever read in my Bible that God promises to make us Great.
But all of this false doctrine I didn’t know about on my first trip to Uganda. I wasn’t aware of the undertone of lusted-after-grandeur and of God being the big fix-it-all-button. Nevertheless, the Holy Spirit led me to preach this sermon, to share this message:

It is good to gather today. And we do so in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

We come together not as people who have nothing in common. For regardless of the circumstances of our lives being different, the experiences of our lives, the trouble that comes our way as human beings, is much the same all over the globe.

And the manner by which God meets us in our difficulty is the also the same. No matter where we live, no matter what color our skin and no matter our socioeconomic status or the culture in which we find ourselves, at our emotional core we all need God the same way.

You may think that Canada has no trouble. But there is trouble all over the globe. Let me share with you a bit of my own story.

You see, I have known what it is to go without food, for at one time I was starving myself so my children could eat. I’ve known what it is to not be able to clothe my kids, I’ve known what it is to rely on the donations of others in order to clothe my children.

I’ve known what it is to be verbally and psychologically abused. I’ve known a bad marriage and of being mocked by the one who swore to love me.

And I’ve known what it is to be sexually abused; for twice as a child I was raped.

And in and through all of that I have come to know a God who is greater than these things, and that walks with us through all of life’s experiences, the good the bad and the ugly.

God does not promise to fix our lives, but he does promise to walk alongside as we go through life. His presence makes all the difference, and God in the gift of Jesus Christ, has gone to extremes to ensure that we can walk together.

We think that God owes us something. But fact of the matter is, God owes us nothing, and we on the other hand, owe him our very lives.

The summer that I was working through the rape memories, the Spirit asked me this,

“In light of everything that has gone bad. In spite of everything that is horribly wrong, will you love me, will you trust me, and will you know me to be good?”

I had accepted Christ as my Savior at the age of six, but that acceptance was in the light of a rosy all-is-right with the world perspective. Christ is easy to accept in the fairytale of our lives.

This time, some 35 years later, Christ was asking me again. “Will you love me, will you trust me, and will you know me to be good?”

It was a hard place. Could I? Would I?

How much do we love God? Do we love him, do we trust him, and will we know him to be good?

My faith up till that point in time had been fairly shallow (now in retrospect). You see a gospel that says come to God and your life will be fixed is shallow at best, blasphemous at worst.

Will our lives steadily increase as we walk with God? Yes!

Do our lives become increasingly free as we give our lives over to Christ? Yes!

But nowhere are we promised that our lives will be fixed.

And so, if God does not fix your life, if nothing changes, and in light of all that is bad, will you love him, will you trust him, and will you know him to be good?

For you see, our decision to give over our lives to the living God, comes before anything gets better. It comes before we see resolutions and before there is relief. We must ask ourselves, how much do we love God today?

And what things have you been holding out as a prerequisite to your full involvement with him? What deals have you been trying to make? What assurances are you demanding?

God owes us nothing, we on the other hand, owe God our very lives.

Speaking this message that first trip, I never knew how revolutionary a message it would be in light of the Uganda culture, never realized that it is a message in direct opposition to the ‘Come to God and he will make you great or big or wealthy or healthy or… ”

But I am pretty sure it is not revolutionary just in Uganda, but in Canada as well.

These revolutionary messages of the heart of God are exactly the work we as Capturing Courage International are called to preach. It is the core of the Biblical Training that we are taking, the core of the Leadership Development and Emotional and Spiritual Freedoms.

What do we believe about God?

What does God say about God?

And what might we bring to God today?

Surrender

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journeying in UgandaIt was one of my first days in Madudu. I was with Pastor Kakuba and we were making our way down the road, stopping at different homes to encourage and pray for folks and to bring some medicines to those in need.

There was something lovely about stopping at a home where I had on an earlier trip prayed for a Mamma and unborn baby, and to this time stop and meet that new little one.

Something lovely about stopping at the home of a woman whom loves me and whom I love. Sitting with her on her mat, enjoying a short visit of simply being in each others company, communicating by heart and through our eyes and smiles.

From home to home we went.

I cannot adequately describe the beauty and joy on the faces of the elderly as we pulled up to their homes and entered to visit and pray for a time. By now a number of these elderly faces are familiar, but even more familiar are the individual spirits of each person.

I recognize the light in those eyes, and the broad smile of that one, the gracious heart of yet another. And into these spaces that they hold for me, I enter, am welcomed, settle in and rest. It is deep communion with one another.

One dear old woman, before we left, skittered away for a moment to return with money to press into my hand. And with my heart in my throat, and my inside voice screaming ‘No! you keep the money’, I simply accepted it and gave a heartfelt thank-you.

A widow with little to live on, managing day to day… there are no words.

Farther down the road we stopped at a home in the ‘center’ of many others. As we would travel the calls of greeting, “Mazungu” would echo along and often it seemed that people were aware of our coming before we actually arrived.

Regardless of how, at this ‘center’ home it was the same. Within minutes of our feet touching the ground, there was a crowd of young and old alike.

A large mat was spread on the ground and onto this mat the people began kneeling that I might pray over them. Not everyone of course, but simply those who wanted.

(Note: Lately I’ve been dissatisfied with our word ‘prayer’. For it does not capture near well enough, the act of blessing and of pouring on of love and of declaring peace over another.)

Many came and went, and as I remained, kneeling on the mat while Pastor Kakuba spoke with others, and while the doctor gave out the medicines to still more, a little one knelt.

She was about eight years old. Was wrapped in a shawl around her head and over her shoulders. Covered, but not covered enough to hide all the mud markings over her entire body and head and face.

Those markings indicate a sort of satan worship, and one can only imagine all the evil and horrors she has seen and witnessed, as accompanied with that.

But there she knelt. Quietly yet simply stating by action, ‘Please pray for me’.

The motion of her kneeling and waiting, held a regal strength and a firmness of conviction and a dignity that spoke, ‘You have something I need.’

I really don’t have the words to describe that moment, but I do know I will never forget her.

For in her there was the full symbolic struggle between the things of this earth that are only about destruction and horror, and within the heart a plea for things of heaven that are of life and bounty and peace.

She knew this struggle. She knew what she was asking for, most likely more than all the others. Her body language was marked by humility and simple request and a surrender.

It was simply an honor to pray over her. And I will keep praying over her. She has a long battle ahead of her. Being so young, and with influence unto destruction in the adults around her, it won’t be easy by any means.

But I’ll see her in heaven one day. For she asked, and received. For at the core of accepting Christ is surrender. Pure simple surrender.

(postscript: To explain the context and the magnitude of this child’s actions, it is important for me to explain that children in Uganda do not come forward for anything on their own. There is not this initiative or boldness or clarity to ask for anything. Even now, years after the encounter with this girl moves me deeply).